Coffee Links To Al Quaeda's Agression

When I’m not dodging bears, bobcats of falcons in the mountains of Colorado, I spend a great deal of time at the library.  Yes.  The library. Since I can never make up my mind on what I’d like to read, I close my eyes and walk down any aisle, arms outstretched, and the first book I touch, I check out.

Yesterdays book was Caffeine Blues by Stephen Cherniske, M.S.  His book mentions that coffee (caffeine) causes:

adrenal stress
low blood pressure
mood and energy swings
depression
malnutrition
insomnia
decrease in brain function
and my very favorite anger and hostility.

So does coffee have any links to Attention Deficit Disorder?  Stephen Cherniske makes no mention in his book, although I did find on one A.D.D. website that making your children a protein shake with General Mills coffee is a recommended dietary drink for kids with A.D.D.  I also found on this website that 100 mg of caffeine equals 5 mg of Ritalin.  Who knew?

But more importantly:
"Coffee causes anger and hostility"

Since coffee is found to be a root cause of anger and hostility, wouldn't it be safe to say that coffee may very well be the link to Al Quaeda's aggression? 

Is anyone monitoring their coffee intake? 

Only a real caffeine addict would have the ability to master those monkey bars. Their agility to glide across those bars like any third grader is telling proof that they are pushing past the recommended moderate level of 300 mg/day ( A level not supported by Stephen Cherniske).

Consider the average recruit's complexion:

Puffiness around the eye area or the "reverse raccoon look": a sign that your caffeine intake is depleting your body of water and nutrients.

Brownish/dark colored spots: Again.  Too much caffeine but nothing a little exfoliation with lemon won't cure.

Ruddy a.k.a. plethoric complexion: Tells me your caffeine intake exceeds way over 1440 mg a day. That's like 12 cups @ 120mg /per cup. Try a nighttime toner and blemish removal cream prescribed by your dermatologist.

Coarse brittle hair: Born with it.

In fact, are Al Quaeda recruits even aware of the food pyramid?

If you see here, caffeine is at the very top of the pyramid which means less consumption of caffeine, fats and oils and the most consumption of grains, breads and cereals.  (Although I think this pyramid may be a bit outdated).

If you are an Al Quaeda recruit or know of anyone who is, you may want to take the Caffeine Blues Addiction Quiz.

If you find that you are addicted consider getting on the
Off The Bean and On To Vitality system that is a pain-free way of kicking the caffeine habit!

Comments

[Mark]

I WAS starting to wonder about my menstrual irregularity and sore breasts...

[meleah rebeccah]

I am obsesed with coffee. I drink waaaaaaaaaay too much of the stuff.

[melevision]

Yeah, I have to drink too much coffee. I have two jobs, three blogs and a child! I wish they made an intravenous drip for coffee.

[Mike]

I'm one of those very rare human beings that never drinks coffee. Of course I also find myself dozing off in front of the computer several times a day, so perhaps I could use a little more caffeine in my life.

[Sergio]

I dont' like coffee...
Good blog!!!